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Being an Ambivert

A few months ago I woke up to a Facebook notification from a former co-woker who had excitedly posted an article on my wall claiming that "we have a name!". The year before we had given our students a personality inventory and when we took the test my co-worker and I came back with the strangest results. In fact whenever I take a personality test, and I am a bit of a personality test junkie, I always get very strange results. I clicked on the link and as I read the article I got more and more excited I HAD A NAME! I HAD A CATEGORY I FIT IN. I am an Ambivert.

The Science of People defines Ambiverts as  "Someone who exhibits qualities of both introversion and extroversion."

Armed with this new information I started to really examine my life and the situations I find myself in and began to see a pattern-- Social structure. The more structured the event the more comfortable I am. Over the past few months I have really learned how to wrangle my Ambivert-ness to work FOR ME and not against me.

Be Prepared
As much as I want to have control over every social situation I walk into that is just not possible (lame, right?). My aim is to be as mentally prepared as possible when I walk into a social situation. In smaller social situations I try to find out who will be there, just knowing names of people even if I have never met them is mentally calming. In larger situations I often research the physical space and or the organization holding the event. For me the more information the better. Often times that leads to a little bit of facebook/instagram/google stalking, but for ambiverts the internet is a beautiful thing!

Ask for a Job
I am always the first to volunteer to help either before the event or after I get there, and it't not just because mama taught me to be polite (for the record, she did ). Having a job allows me to socialize on my own terms. If I feel of wave of introvert I can politely excuse myself under the guise of my job. If I am feeling comfortable and extroverted in the moment I can stand and socialize for a few minutes.

Know Your Quirks
One of the tendencies of a ambivert, or at least this ambivert, is to get really excited and over talk on a common subject/interest. Often times it comes off as being a "one upper" when in fact I am just trying to connect with someone. Knowing that this is a quirk of my personality has really allowed me to slow down and be more intentional with my words. Reese often slightly nudges me or shoots me a quick text if I am accidentally hogging the conversation.]

Know When To GO! 
As an ambivert I recharge by being alone. Somedays I can totally handle being around a ton of people and be "on" for hours upon hours, but I also know when to get myself out of a situation and recharge by myself for a few minutes. Once during a school conference I lied about having lunch plans and sat in my car for the entire hour and a half just to recharge.

Say YES!
Just because I am an ambivert doesn't mean I don't want to do things. In fact, it means I desperately want to do things and be social but I have a hard time initiating. Since I have discovered my ambivert-ness I have tried to say "YES!" to events that come my way. The simple act of saying yes and knowing how my personality works have drastically shaped the way I approach social situations.

Here is  a helpful article, quiz and a funny BuzzFeed listicle on being an Ambivert!

The Lost Personality Type


21 Signs You Might be an Ambivert 

1 comment:

Kathleen said...

I love this. I feel like I have some of these same qualities. You've described them perfectly by the way. The whole being alone to recharge is so me. At school usually I'll eat lunch with a few other teachers (never in the teachers lounge though because that place is scary) but there will be at least 1 day a week that I eat alone in my room with the door shut. Just because I need those 30 minutes to not talk to anyone and just relax.